Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
