Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
