ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
