So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
