So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
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