i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Sext me about skeletons
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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