Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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