he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
