Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize