oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize