i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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