It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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