Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
