Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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