Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

My room smells like vodka and shame

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.

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(650): View more from California

just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.

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(707): View more from California

I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever

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(910): View more from North Carolina

I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination

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(301): View more from Maryland

Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.

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(802): View more from Vermont

i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.

(1-847): View more from Illinois

What a great combination.

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