he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Someone signed my nipple.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
