Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
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