Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
