Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
