I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
