So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
