my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
