Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
