A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
