I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
