Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
So much Jack, so little girl.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
