My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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