idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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