I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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