these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
