Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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