sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Randomize
