If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
