i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize