Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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