so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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