She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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