We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Two words: blizzard sex
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize