So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
