physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
