Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Shame - the story of my life.
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