He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
