And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
