Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
