i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
