its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
