Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
