Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
