my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
