is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
the day after is always just damage control
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
My ATM looks so different sober.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
